miercuri, 29 martie 2017

What's Between Us by Claudia Lorenz

What's Between Us by Claudia Lorenz

A different version of this note and thoughts on other books are available at:


Films about sexual orientation, finding one's preference seem to be increasing in number and prominence.

Moonlight has won the Academy Award for Best Picture and in other categories.
Granted, it took a second announcement to make it the winner, but a story of gay men can now win the biggest and once more conservative prizes.

Brokeback Mountain was favorite to win years ago, but the Award for Best Picture finally recompensed a narrative about homosexual people.

In What's Between Us, we seem to have a film about an average, "normal" family.

Alice has been married to Frank for eighteen years.
They have children and have a comfortable life.

They are happy, apparently.
This is about to change.

In a computer, gay sites are visible and Alice is worried.
She asks her teenage boy if he was searching for videos with homosexual sex online.

The mother thinks that the son may try to discover his sexuality.
He could be gay.
But he denies it in a manner that appears frank, open and amused

So Alice has to look elsewhere…

She engages her husband in a conversation and when asked, the man says that he did search the web for porn…

-          Gay porn?
-          Yes
-          ??
-          I was curious…

Only it is not just that.
Psychologists say that having an affair is not the cause of the breakup of marriages, relationships and partnerships.

-          The affair is the symptom, not the cause
-          Things Were Falling Apart (Chinua Achebe) before and the affair is one manifestation

When they talk more on the subject, it turns out that Frank is attracted to men.
He does not want or have a transformation like we see in Transparent.

But when the spouse is trying to seduce, get him excited, she fails.
Miserably.

In one scene, she is kissing and holding him only to be pushed on the floor.
The man is not a bisexual, but a homosexual now…I think.

In another instance, it is felatio that she tries and then penetration, but it is another disaster.

So it is going downhill for Frank and Alice.
He finds a lover.

His spouse is curious, mad or both and tries to see the man.
Her rival.

Alice enters the shop where her enemy works and orders a sandwich and an ice tea, after sniffing the cheese.
Invited by the rather pleasant opponent.

And we are familiar with the conflict that escalates in such circumstances, with recriminations and the separation.
I thought I identified the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse as explained by The Ultimate Expert in Relationships:

-          John Gottman in his masterpiece The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work:
-          Contempt
-          Defensiveness
-          Stonewalling
-          Criticism


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