Old School, story by Court Crandall

Old School, story by Court Crandall

This is not the film where the audience is invited to meditate, think profoundly on the meaning of life – that is for another, stupendous comedy, actually, perhaps the best there is: Monty Python’s Life of Brian- but it has three phenomenal actors that would entertain a less demanding viewer.

Luke Wilson is Mitch aka the Godfather of a fraternity that is established on unlikely premises, after he has a terrifying experience one night, as he comes home to hear moans and sexual screams from the bedroom, where his girlfriend, Juliette Lewis aka Heidi is waiting on the bed,

The loud pleasure noises are coming from the television, for there is a porn film on and the relieved boyfriend says he thought there might be someone with Heidi, but this is all right, since he also uses material…it is magazines in his case, but since there is this film, they can do it…

He starts undressing, in front of the embarrassed woman, who keeps looking behind him, wherefrom a couple approaches, blindfolded, nude and ready to party in what looks like a threesome, up to the point where Mitch exists the house, only to see another man at the door, interested in the…orgy.

Heidi claims she had kept trying to tell him, but he seems to have trusted her so much, had such a different idea about the partner he was sharing the house with that her allusions and interventions have had no echo.

This is where one could think of the ultimate expert on couples, John Gottman, author of the quintessential The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work, wherein he purports that partners need to know the other in detail, preferences, hobbies, favorite teams, and all the rest.

Or else…we could find ourselves in the position of Mitch, who comes home to the supposedly devoted, tender, loving girlfriend…who actually is waiting for the whole block to attend her orgy…this is evidently the extreme, proposed here for mirthful reasons, but knowledge of the important other half is nevertheless essential.

Mitch moves out, while his good friend Frank aka Will Ferrell is getting married, in spite of the opposition of the third member of this Invincible Team, Beanie aka Vince Vaughn, who is not just married, but has children and says he is an authority on marital issues – problems mainly.

While Frank is waiting for his bride in church, Beanie keeps forecasting the Apocalypse and asks the groom to run as fast as he can and save himself from the curse of matrimony, which brings unhappiness…look at him, does he look happy?

When Mitch moves into his new abode, Beanie is determined to take control of arrangements, turn the new place into a bachelor’s paradise, with continuous partying, a bar in the corner a gig that very night.

Although the host is not interested – at least to begin with – the intrepid, married man has already invited about forty men, eager to have maximum fun, in the evening when the whole college would know about this new fraternity and its wild ways.

The house is on the premises of the college campus and after the first thunderous night, a man shows up at the door, somebody they had met before, they even mocked and he turns out to be the dean, who gives notice that they would be ejected soon.

Indeed, there are many silly, if not completely stupid acts committed in the name of this fraternity, or in order to join it, as tests, but they all seem to be inspired from real life, where innocents have been left to die in the woods, made to perform despicable things in the name of one fraternity or another.

Young and old men – Blue is approaching ninety! – have their penises tied with a rope to a heavy weight, which is then thrown down from a height in a test that is supposed to expose the absolute confidence that members have in their leaders, their extreme loyalty and one might add their stupidity as well.

One weight does fall through a canal, albeit the sex organ in question is not severed in the process.

Alhamdulillah!

Watching the trio of superb artists perform is a delight at times, while when the script involves the aforementioned shenanigans it can be embarrassing, no matter what outlandish qualities Will Ferrell and the others possess.

One cannot make gold out of guano, no matter what the talents of the alchemist are.

Mitch becomes the Godfather of the fraternity and is celebrated as such through the campus.

The scene wherein the newly married Frank runs naked on the streets of the town, after having had too much to drink at the inaugural party, running into his wife and her friends, who are riding in the car is funny, although not hilarious.

Overall, the Metascore of 54 seems about right…the metascore represents the average of the ratings of the critics.